Quirky ME!!

Been more than a year now! Yes! Apparently the reason why I didn’t want to take up a job was the fear of losing out on writing, blogging to be more precise! But who cares? First it was me being compared with folks around me, as if there was a need to do a comparative study and publish a full-proof analysis report in the pdf format!! Being sick and tired of the blabber and chirpy sounds around me, I left for a city where my life sucked even more. Still that was better because I was left on my own, nobody to answer for, no time bound stuffs happening throughout the day. The people I came across, didn’t quite enthuse me. Not that I wanted to be so but then when you all on your own, you feel the need of a shoulder to rest on. My best friend gave me two quick visits and lightened up my life but I guess I wasn’t really ready to take such short run gains on my stride! I failed to take the best out of it. It was a different me! Time passed by! I cribbed the entire 9 months for being there, worst than the labor pain I guess. Mom says labor pain is really tough to pass through but as an individual right at that point those 9 months were pretty tough.

I came back after a year and started writing all of a sudden. It gave me the inner strength and helped me to bloom out in full. My narcissist tendencies blew up in colors. The camera in my hand gave me a new life. This time I was satisfied but they were not! They wanted me to move on again. So after a year long hiatus I joined a company reluctantly and ended up writing, “Click Next to continue”!! I lost out on most of my good habits. Yes! there was a time when I loved writing like mad, reading books almost anytime I could find time out, doing photography – all of them were gone in a stroke. My relationship with Lord Sensei got strained and I lost touch with him. But then came a time when working day in and day out, I started looking at life with a different lense! The pupils got enlarged and I could see a black smoke slowly approaching my doorstep. I realized it was time I grow out of my shell and bring out the better me whom Sensei had carved out with so much of love. If he had given me so many good things in my life, if he had brought out the true me which I never knew off then why not give it a chance once and be the person whom I should be! And you would be surprised to know, I truly changed into a different being. Got connected with Sensei once again, thanks to the network which followed me!! Yes I jolted back to life with a positive true spirit. Work was there but it stopped bothering as it did previously. I was happy with myself since I was evolving as a human out of the closet!!

Then came a time when I started humming on the stairs and came across a person whose chords struck on the right note and eventually the wheel sped off! She was one of those people inside office who strummed an accurate G Minor! Work was there but the little time we all got in between struggling schedules was kept for a little fun but I guess those nosy eyes didn’t want us to enjoy this freedom. Birds of the same feather were flocking together but the vultures just wanted to rip off the wings and they apparently did that. She was victimized and that dealt with the first blow! For the first time in my life I wanted to fight back against those who don’t matter to me since I have always believed in something opposite. To me I have always fought with those who are too close to me and have shut the doors for those whose existence doesn’t matter to me. Guess it was time to turn around. Someone tried to mentor me and drift me away from the person whom I was becoming close to. This was the best opportunity in my life to do what we call a “Reply to All” in Outlook!! A few days of silence killed me and there I was speaking out my mind. As far as professional contracts are concerned I can bear the grunt on me but not something on the personal count since there’s restricted entry dear! Days passed and I came to know quite a few people through her who matter a lot to me today. This is apparently the reason why I can’t leave her all alone today! Not because I am indebted but also because Sensei, She, and My brother have become an integral part of my life.

The months of September, October, November, and ongoing December took me through rapid changes and seeped me through the tidal waves. The color was a deadly blue one!! I met my brother after a lifetime and got the best love of my life and guess how all this happened!! Sensei showed me the path to love. He only said that my happiness lies in making others happy and here I was trying to spread and share as much as I could. After a long time there I was feeling like a kid standing all alone atop a cliff overlooking the sea with three shadows at the back. The ups and downs in my life don’t matter anymore to me. The different shades of life that I have seen have been a wonder for my eyes. It was through her that I met my brother and the two started pouring so much love on me that all that I could is lie on their lap and be loved forever. No today! am not an afraid soul anymore since I know I have them with me, within me but know what? Because of all this love that I being showered with I have stopped writing and doing stuff which I normally used to do whenever I would be free. But now I don’t have much time or rather I don’t allow time to fit into my love! For the past few weeks am having a thought which perturbs me badly while am asleep! Why is it that am not doing what I loved doing the most at one point of time – the answer lies with me!! I have just too many things lined up the platter. Took time out to see some good works!

Have been traveling quite a lot over the past one month and now I have too many ideas on my mind to write up pesticidal write ups!! Yesterday I went to a college fest after a long time and one of my very good friend (8 years senior to me!!) told me quite many things about life. As I discussed about the different facets of life with him he told me why we all lose out on the battle of life!! With a slight whisker he said why we all should continue doing what we are good at and one brisk moment and my decision was made!! I’ll start writing again, be it whatever crap – I’ll read it, re-read it, re-re-read it and capture the imagery through the wide angle of the lenses!! Think am a little tired right now. Hence am heading straight to meet Hobbes, time to curl up on Hobbes’ lap and talk about geomorphism!! Have to talk to Hobbes about the elders! Time to water them down!! – there you go Calvin!!

Life Saver...

Thank God! I came across FUKITOL...saved up my life....I find no reason to be sad anymore! Living up life to the fullest.. FULLY TOLLED!!

Motto Mantra...

Stop thinking...

Start discussing...

Do something about it...

Open up your whiz book...

Share your experiences with the inner mind...

Explode the balls of wisdom...

Start walking the path of clay...

Conjure up your thoughts...

Capture the imagery through your intrensic lenses...

Read aloud the lines...

Read in between the lines...

Revisit your childhood...

Meet the "3"...

Flip through the folders...

Tune into the music....

Sit on the red couch..

Catch up with THE INCREDIBLES...

Admire the paintings...

Get connected...

Stop following the network wherever it goes...

Stop sparking...it hurts..

Don't go deep...

Give up when you can't...go down instead..

Forget the past...

Run through the present...

Take a ride through the future...

Liven up the spirits of gold..

Give space...

Watch the space at night...

Look at the stars and stare at them whole night..

Wake up with a call to make another...

Quit smoking...

Wishful drinking...

Travelling in a suburban train while listening to the wheels touching the track...

Buy a roadside book...

Wear a shorts and dive straight into the pool to sink and be saved for...

Get a car and speed through the highway...

Meditate near the Ganges...

Watch a sailor rowing his boat along the waters...

Stand in the middle of the road and watch the commotion around...

Smelling old books...

Throw away all junks except the foody stuff...

Keep your room messy..they look better that way...

Figure out disfigured objects...

Wait for someone to call at "8"...
Listen and be strong...
Be honest...
Get scolded...ties up the bond..

Lend your shoulders to rest for...

Go to bed and be obedient...

Crack horny jokes when you are not meant to...

Laugh out loud when you want to...

Wear belts when you should...

Use Johnsons to promote their product...

Dance around like a kid whole day...

End up being someone's dowry..that too in today's world!!

Love and Be loved....

Leave the X-factor behind...

Forget as much as you can...
Remember little things about life...
Leave home without a penny...

Stop being nosy...

Continue with the list when you come up with more!!!

Ok! one more now...put up a pic. with the post to add a magic touch to it...

Well! Well! that's the best mantra of life...sleep and let others sleep...TRULY ME!!!

Choose the lap where you love sleeping the most...

Last but not the least...always center align your stuff!!

Eternity and a Day...

I just feel like pouring it down...when two people in my life who are so close to me came even more close to each other...kept staring at one with utter innocence when she told me about it...but then it was something very natural...general nuances life has to offer at every juncture...my responses to such stuff always comes out in umms...n hmms...you might think that i must be listening to a lot of those gregorian chants but if that is what you think my friend you are mistaken...no i seriously find it difficult to express myself anymore beyond that...when it comes to them i seriously turn comfortably numb...one night stay under the cloudy sky and then the morning jumps into the light to usher in a life full of joy and something which is not measurable...some times when you want to sleep but you can't...you feel the person sitting next to you wouldn't be sitting the same as he/she does the next moment you see them....perhaps that was the case with the two of them...right at 2 he wanted to sleep but she didn't....guess something was wrong with the time...only a crazy nut can think about not wanting to sleep at 2 in the night...leave all those gushy words of you being here, how can i really sleep....one drop of N10 n you dive straight into the dreamy world of your own...cut the crap! yes! that is what she says...so getting back to basics and listening to all that she has to say all the time...i cut to the prelude...or should i call it the interlude?? now that the clock struck 3, it was quiet all around and she was humming the song she loved to sing but poor bugger din't wake up...what a dry...flopsy moron he was...nevertheless in order to continue with the saga...the rain started pouring in a little late....and after a little while it stopped and it was all clear...the stars shone brightly up there...hey did you notice what time it was then? perhaps not...know why? the clock decided to stop ticking for a moment...since it wanted to give away the seconds to her...the whole cosmos of love being showered upon her she was all in joy....take a steep turn now...here comes the rising sun....it's already dawn now....he is awake now and he doesn't want the sun to shine brilliantly and remind him more about the day's wannabe things...he grabs her tight n takes a cab straight to a place near Ganges...the careless whisper around her ears mesmerizes her and puts her into a trance....a mellowed halo full of skinny circles...they sit near the river for a while and as she throws those elliptical pebbles down into the water suddenly a golden fish comes out of the bed and says something to her....he draws himself close to her and they dive straight into the deep sea...the color of blue fills her from within...a color that she smells...a color that she dreams...a color that she paints all over...taking a ride underneath they see a brand new world...they sweep through the seeds and smell its fragrance...cut to the basics and now you see them back to bed...yes! no one's at home...guess the muggles energized their grey matter up to let them be alone for one day in this entire ring of time....all this while she was sweeping through the water and the night before's calmness was getting over her...she felt asleep on his shoulders and let him hold her tight...they wanted to take a peaceful sleep but the milkman at the door had come all across the milky way to deliver the galactic message of blessings from the aura of love...Zeus had sent it with love...he opened the door with a gasp and closed it with a bang...there she was lying on the bed holding her breath back....he just stepped into his short pants and went in for a rendezvous riding the roller...what more? it's 8:30 now...time for you to wake up...time for him to wake up and time for her before all to wake him up...the same old bus takes them back to their belongings n this crap from me ends for the day...see ya tomorrow again...till then keep listening to red chillies and enjoy...sorry for this long commercial break...actually i was trying to write up a jingle...but surprisingly i ended up mingling it with something else...the tinkle in her eyes sparkled with a blue sprinkle...eeeekkk!! am drooling now...YUKON HOO!!! adieu....

Let the spirits speak…

Just as I gazed at your eyes full of tears…
A quick jolt of lightening touched my heart…
It’s something from the past that I have carried along with myself…
The grief stricken faces of those near to me hurts me the most…
And since you were like a distant stranger from the past…
It struck me the most…
Although I don’t feel like writing at this weary hour of the day…
Your eyes have moved me beyond the boundaries of the horizon…
You may never find solitude in me…
But you can always seek the peace within me…
I shall always be there as a shadow beneath the pillars, even when I cease to exist…
But my shoulders will be there forever for you to rest on…
Why do you need to worry about what bothers you the most…
Just close your eyes and dream a little dream with me…
…and you shall see the stretch of ocean overlooking the cliff…
Lie down on the grassy meadows and gaze at the sky above on a moonlit night…
Your mind will flow like a river…
Never worry when your string breaks apart…
Hundreds more shall appear…
Just don’t say a word…since they belong only to me…
Open the window of your mind and let go of yourself…
Just let the spirits speak…Just let the spirits speak…

Inverted Mirror!!

Looking at the inner self. Took this photo about a month back on the day of Titli's Annaprashan. Can you guys believe this?? My little princess has already grown 7 months old!! I had posted about her arrival 7 months back. I look different and that's all that I can say - rest lies on you to comment for. Colleagues say that I would be wearing a saree more often but I refuse to accept this. The informal look gives me an edge over the saree I feel. Not a point to contest for!! I better make a move now. Some prize distribution going to take place within our office premises...goofy stuff!!

Lost in the world of darkness…

Lost in the world of darkness…
Here I am waiting for you since ages…
You had once left me here with a ray of light to be my guide…
Eversince the moment you left me alone in the green bushes…
I have been counting my days to meet you in the twilight zone of love…
Holding your hands I have come into this world of drudgery…
There has not been a single moment when you have let me feel the absence of light around…Your voice has been the source of inspiration for me…
In your presence I have never been able to sleep…
In your absence tears have prevented me from sleep…
Are you waiting somewhere near the bend to meet with the beloved?
Give me a call out in the dark and I shall surely follow the path shown by the guided stroke of love…
Just give me one more stroke of love from your pocket full of rye…
..and that shall leave me in this world with a hope to live for….

Ma...

Have you ever felt the silence of the night?
There have been times when I have spent the night alone thinking about the starry lights...
Your eyes have been the only source of inspiration for me at that moment of night...
I have felt your absence as a child...
Tears have flown down my face like a river during the high tide...
I have craved for you at that wink hour of the night since you are the only thread that binds me with the life around...
The pain within your soul strikes me the most since I cannot bear to see the little drops trickling down your face...
The loss of your beloved has withdrawn your tender touch from my soul...
I want you to come back to the world you once belonged to...
Just close your eyes with me and feel the touch of love within...
I shall hold you like an eagle and embrace you to evade the cold outside...
Rejuvenating your spirits you shall fly away with me to some far across land...
Sitting atop a cliff overlooking the sea I shall spend the day in your lap...
Oh! Mother hold me in your arms as the night arrives in our doorstep...
Forget about the anguish within and hold me tight so that we don’t get swept across by the storm blowing outside..
Oh! Mother hold me tight and let me be with you!!
Oh! Mother hold me tight and let me be with you!!